I Read Subtitles Too Slow the Other Day and It Really Fucked Me Up.
Always considered myself a slightly above-average reader. Maybe wasn’t the sharpest during those popcorn reading days, but I was serviceable. Off the bench get you 6 kinda guy.
Whatever man. My head-to-mouth reading game wasn’t that strong.
As for upstairs, I mean, it’s pretty tough to compare your reading speed to someone else.
“I read 52 books last year!” Ok, did they read and listen, or just read? If the latter, that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re fast; they just set aside more time.
Reading next to someone? Hear them flippin’ more frequently than you? Doesn’t mean shit! Maybe they got a little Slaughterhouse-Five while you’re grinding through some David Foster Wallace.
I’ve had 2-3 fair moments to judge my mental reading speed.
Feel like one time we got a new book to read in English class. Had 10 minutes left in the period. Teach takes a knee (metaphorically speaking): “Go ahead and read for the last 10 minutes. Give you guys a little head start on tonight’s reading assignment.”
I remember locking in. Which really wasn’t on par with my behavior in high school. Was more of a fuck around and find out kid. Anywho, I’m in there. Reading. Grinding. I hear a couple flips around me. Immediately judge myself, “Ok, I have a couple more sentences left. I’m not the fastest but…” Flip. After my flip, I hear a collection of flips. “Ok. Not podium, but feel like I beat about 60% of them.”
Cut to 2026.
Must’ve slowed down with my old age. Always knew it to be true in my hockey and basketball leagues, but upstairs? Mentally? Fuck man…
Always had visions of me growing old, constantly challenging my mind, learning new traits and skills. Being that old guy in a college classroom. Writing, reading, watching, always stepping outside the comfort zone…
Not worth it anymore.
No saving me.
I am now stupid.
- Bobby D